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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Reasons why Women would leave Men…

1. Mr. Bad Manners. “While eating spaghetti, he practically buried his face in the bowl and slurped the noodles, then tried to talk to me with noodles dangling from his mouth,” says Jenny, 29, of Washington, D.C., who dated Todd, 32, for three months. “I wish I had seen his bad manners earlier,” says Jenny. “What I learned is that people can stay on their best behavior for a few weeks, or even months, but eventually, the truth comes out. I guess that Todd was on his best behavior the first month or so. He didn’t show such poor table manners at first. But after asking him repeatedly and politely to stop chewing with his mouth open, I finally gave up. He wouldn’t listen to me and was very defensive about the whole subject. I learned one thing about myself. Bad table manners are my deal-breaker.”
Lesson to learn: Stay on your best manners—until they become your everyday manners.
2. Mr. Cheapo. “Barry, the man I was seeing for five months, is cute, but I hate that he’s cheap,” says Linda, 37, of Norfolk, VA. “He’s my age and makes a good living as a lawyer. So he has no excuse, really. Cheapness is the kiss of death for me. I hate when a man you’re seeing turns into an accountant at the end of a meal or event. Barry would turn to me and say, ‘And your half comes to…,’ until it finally drove me crazy. The final straw was when, on my birthday, he gave me a tacky “re-gift” out of his closet. To top it off, he never wanted to spend money going to plays or cultural events. I’m not saying a guy needs to spend a mint on me, but I believe money should be used in moderation to create great shared experiences and convey affection. It wasn’t about the money as much as it was his attitude.”
Lesson to learn: Be open to spending some money on shared experiences that bond the two of you and create great memories. Also know that there are plenty of women out there who expect a guy to pay until the relationship is rock-solid (not saying it’s fair, just that’s the way it is).

3. Mr. Zero Ambition. “We had fun at first,” says Stacy, 35, of Pasadena, CA, about her short-term boyfriend Allan, 36. “But I had to leave him after six months. Yes, he was a nice guy. It just didn't feel right with him because he has no future ambition, like getting married or wanting to have a stable career. He works at a video store, which would have been fine, but he just doesn’t seem to care about what he does or have any plan for his life (hey, he usually didn’t even have a plan for the weekend!). Eventually, I want to buy a home and fix it up with my husband. I also want to have kids, which costs a lot of money these days, so I need a guy who cares at least a little about finances. I enjoyed his company for the months we were together, but his passive approach to just watching his life go by got to me. It got boring to be with a guy who never wanted to do anything but watch TV.”

Lesson learned: Think about where you want to be in 5 or 10 years, and take steps to go after it. Take a small risk, show some initiative. And if your job doesn’t thrill you, try sharing something else that you are passionate about — Mexican food, kayaking, whatever — with your date so she can learn from you and feel a deeper connection and an excitement about being with you.



Jemmy said...

Very, very true... but it applies to both sexes, seriously, especially the part about the manners and ambition...

SET said...

I know Jemmy, whats up girl?